At Last a Sports Governing Body Makes a Bold, Needed Move to Enforce Fair Competition and Gay Male Excitement!

In what has got to be the greatest advancement in the history of organized sports, the International Swimming Federation, fresh on the heels of an international summit with 16 swimsuit manufacturers, has announced a new series of rules designed to eliminate swim wear that gives swimmers an unnatural “buoyancy” advantage in the water.

In last summer’s Olympics, there were 108 world records set.  That’s an amazing amount of records for one competition.  Yes, for sure, swimmers – such as the Thorpedo and Michael Phelps – are amazing athletes.  However, there was a lot of consternation before and after the Olympics about the prevalence of buoyancy suits the swimmers were wearing.  Well the Federation has said “enough”.  They have already banned the outfit that Thorpe wore, and the Speedo LZR Racer is likely to be next.  There is even talk of making suits be “buoyancy tested” prior to being eligible for wearing in competition.

In essence, the Federation is going to use these new rules to get rid of all the body suits that the swimmers wear. In turn, this means that swimmers will, going forward, be pretty much left with nothing to wear except skimpy, skimpy, SKIMPY little bikini-type-thong trunks.

See, I told you it was the greatest advancement in the history of organized sports!

Nod to Outsports.com. 

(Photo: Getty Images)

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A Cubs and Northwestern fan, Joe Moag is a major sports junkie, and although he still runs, he hasn't been able to dunk anything more than a donut for decades.

Unless otherwise stated, no particular sexual orientation of anyone depicted is implied or should be presumed.

Comments

[Scott]

Well, there *is* something to be said for bringing back the tiny speedo...but some of those body suits were pretty hot too! Need I remind everyone of the famed Michael Phelps pic showing off the newest Speedo body suit? http://evilbeetgossip.film.com/2008/08/14/i-want-to-do-such-dirty-things-to-michael-phelps/phelps_penis/

:P

[Mike]

Speedos are fucking hot! I get a hard-on whenever I see a hot guy wearing one. This will turn the Olympics back into the hornfest that it's supposed to be!

[Daniel]

Get this straight. The swim suit that was worn in Beijing Olympics by American, Aussie, Canadian, and European swim heroes was so expensive it became a barrier to less financially-endowed swimmers being able to compete fairly. It was swimsuit tyranny and stratifed the sport unfairly. That this is only getting rectified now is abominable - Phelps and the others who competed in this way are not heroes, they are opportunistic villains who should NOT be on the front of a Cheerios box.