Former College Football Captain Was Out To His Team in 2000

In an ideal world gay athletes would be treated exactly the same as anyone else on their team but all too often we hear just the opposite happening. So it's great to hear an encouraging story like Brian Sims'. 

Cyd Zeigler over at Outsports interviewed the former defensive tackle and team captain for the Bloomsburg University football team.  In the interview Sims recalls that he never actually came out to his team.  "My team came out to me" after the team's quarterback was told of his sexuality by one of his former lovers. 

"I knew it was going to happen, I just didn't know how or when," Sims said. "I feared it would change the dynamic in the locker room. You're spending four or five hours a day with your friends, and that's what I played for. I cared that my team would still be comfortable around me. I was concerned that in the locker room guys would be uncomfortable around me."

Instead of being alienated by his teammates what he found was acceptance and a lot of questions. 

"Straight guys tend to be the most curious about sex, in general," Sims said. "My team asked me everything you can possibly ask a gay guy about sex, and in the crudest terms possible."

 But why was his experience different from so many others?  One reason Sims thinks is:

"By the time it happened, I was the longest-running starter on the team. I had a lot of success on the football field. And I think that bought me a certain amount of leeway with this group."

"It became a funny sense of pride for a lot of my teammates and close friends," Sims said. "Pennsylvania is not an extremely liberal state, especially central Pennsylvania. Football players are not what I would consider particularly exposed people, especially college football players. But I think it became a sense of pride for all of them. ‘Not only is this guy an All-Conference player, and not only is he a starter, and not only is he a good friend of mine, but I'm all right with the fact that he's gay.' And I started seeing a lot of that."

You can read the rest of his amazing story here. 

(Photos: Brian Sims/Outsports)

Comments

[blah232]

what a hotty

[Luke]

Wow! That's inspiring.
It gives hope that there may be people out there that can accept people for who and what they are! Great article, it's pretty funny too haha. I'm glad he's able to be out and proud as well.

[dogpoo..]

fancy..

[Travis]

It's good to know that some people in Pennsylvania aren't all haters.
I got crap from administraters back in high school all the time.

[Bob.....Bloomsburg]

I met and got to spend time with Brian while he was attending Bloomsburg University and found him to be nothing more than a warm, caring, and friendly guy. I always wondered what happened to you. :)
Incredible and inspiring article. Way to go Brian!

[The Pianoman]

With the whole not knowing how the team would react and the questions is very true. For me it was my fraternity, and for 3 years now they still ask things in crude way. Props to Brian for being accepted by his friends and teammates. This is an inspiring story for all those who are questioning to come out of the closest.

[JJ]

NO WAY, I know this guy! This is my friend's brother's boyfriend! It is exciting to read about him here!

[Mary Poppins]

Who gives a fuck? It's just an athlete that likes dick and ass. He's no different than every other gay guy who has had to come out. Where are the stories that are written about them?

[Walter]

I think its good for gay.com to show us a story about a non sterotypical gay man. Also his story is inspiring and encouraging. I makes me think how it would have been to me if I would have came out to my team members on the football team. To all you non sterotypical gay me out there continue to show society that we are men too. For my not so sterotypical gay men I still have love for you, keep doing what you do and also show soceity that you are just a much of a man as the next man.

[DJ]

Great story. You make it sound like it is a recent one. To bad it was not printed here 9 years ago when it occurred. I live near this college town.

[Jack]

WHEN do "we hear just the opposite happening."

God, we're sick of this leftist nonsense.

[Zeke]

I don't know this guy, but it is nice to see positive stories out there. It is a shame he could have not come out, hopefully in time that will change too. So much of the news/media and gossip that is out there is negative.

It is time to start focusing on the positive like this. Maybe then the gay "community" will have a more positive image. MANY kudos to gay.com for a story like this! Bravo!

[msuboi08]

This was a very nice coming out story. That guy has a lot of guts to own up to his sexuality (even if his coming out wasn't on his terms). The closet cases and so-called "bisexual" guys could learn from this man's example. It's alright to come out bc those that *truly* care about you won't hold it against you. Oftentimes, the same relatives and friends *do* hold it against the closets and "bi" guys who don't grow a pair and come out already (when it is obvious to most around them that they are gay). Secrets are unhealthy, but honesty isn't.

[Henry]

yea really WHAT A HOTTY! damn!!!

why cant i meet a man like that or known one in HS lol wow

good for him! and whoever he meets later on or is with he is HOT! :)

[jordan]

referring to what blah232 said, "what a hotty". What would have happened if Brian Sims weren't as good looking as he is? Would he have been treated the same? Would he have been treated differently? I think it's the latter.

Correction, blah232: he's gorgeous.

[David]

Sports and mainstream music are still very taboo when it comes to sexuality for men. I'm glad SOMEONE is finally bucking the trend. Shame on how he was outed though.

[Mike]

He's beautiful on the inside and outside of himself. Very caring and considerate. We should all work toward being like him towards others and that alone will - hopefully - create a better world for us all to coexist in the mainstream. Too often we complain, complain, complain about prejudices but we fail to see how our own action put us in a situatios to bear the wrath of prejudiced haters. The responsible thing to do ius rise above it all and take control of whatever situation or challenges present to each of us. Don't know or didn't catch if his former lover "outed" him to the football team mates in a rage of hatred or mean intentions, but am so happy for him that his team mates embraced him for his genuine character.

[Julie]

I wish it would always happen like that.
My town shoved a baseball star (who was found to be gay) in a loose locker and super glued it shut... drove him out to a ditch to die but luckily someone found him because they were out collecting scrap metal. Nothing at all was done.

[mark]

Good job Brian!

[Eric]

I've played sports and been in locker rooms most of my life. There is no way I would have come out to teammates. I'ts great that his teammates were accepting. Half the humor from str8 jocks is calling each other fags and fag jokes. Can't imagine coming out to guys like that. lol.

[Shadlovesmen]

It's always the football players and Frat boys that are the biggest fags and biggest homophobes. Unfortunately, they didn't accept him because that would have been the decent thing to do, they only accepted him because he was a great player and he helped them win a few games.
If he had been just a janitor with the same group of friends, they would have dumped him like a load of dirty laundry.
People need to realize, who gives a damn if YOU don't like it or acccept it; I don't approve or accept people watching "Home Improvement" reruns, but the bottom line is it's none of your or anyone's fucking business what hole a person prefers!

[LaughAttack001]

This is great to hear. I had a very similar and supportive situation throughout high school and on my volleyball team (though...not the same as football is it? Although the football guys were just as comfortable with me, and I know exactly what he means when he says guys are interested in sex and ask in the crudest ways!) Good on him and good on his team, may this mindset continue to thrive.

[Erik]

Imagine being the gay lover of this football stud - the one who outed him. Guess the football stud finally got his revenge by putting this dishonorable behaviour in the national media. I bet that guy who outed him just wants to crawl away and die. Maybe he should!

[San Diego Greg]

Where can I find someone like him?

[Sparky]

What a handsome guy. And he sounds smart too. I'm a gay Boxer myself. I went Pro in '01 and never looked back. Coming up (not out) in my sport of Boxing was difficult enough. Coming OUT, was unthinkable. However, there's something about hard work (training) in a group setting, and proving that, it doesn't matter.

Sure, I'm gay, but my punches hurt as much as a straight man's. The other guys respect me, not just for winning a Title but for being a comrade. They've never talked about my sexuality in a negative way either.

And trust me, regardless of being in just a sparring match or in an actual competitive fight, SEX and how hot the guy you're fighting is is the LAST thing on your mind.

WHERE CAN I FIND A LIFE PARTNER AS BRIGHT AND HANDSOME AS THIS GUY?!?!!?!?

[wallace]

too bad the ex lover told everyone about him. Same old story. Too bad some of the gays could keep their mouth shut. If he wanted the world to know, he would do so on his own terms. What a shitty thing to do !
boy, is he good looking ! wow ! Yes, I'll date you ! anytime,anywhere. Make it safe sex though. wow ! what a dream !

[Jason]

Just personal opinion...but I think that's the case with alot of gay people. Some feel it necessary as soon as they meet someone and say "Hi, I'm so-and-so, and I'm gay". If you're ok with that...great! I think it's makes it alot easier for others who tend to be closest to come out and tell those that know them as individuals first...then find out. Some don't see you as person if they hear you're gay first. It's sad, but that's the stereotypes that every minority faces in this country. I've said my peace...Amen. :)

[Samuel]

As a golfer playing a very conservative sport, I have nearly always kept my sexual identity. There have been maybe two or three times when I came out to someone whom I thought had a need to know because a genuine friendship seemed to be there. The response was that it didn't matter, however, the disclosure clearly created a distance between us each time. End result, it accomplished nothing except regret on my part for having come out.

[Tom]

My first BF was my captain on the wrestling team. Sounds hot? NOT! He was my first BF, I was just a "good buddy" to him.

[Ray]

Think we'd be having this conversation if the captain of the defense was gay, 5'11" and 285 pounds with a huge sagging gut? Nope. The first thing the "gay community" needs to get over is it's own stereotyping. Not everyone looks like they just came from an A&F photo shoot.

[Jake_castillo]

Friggin HOT young kid, and cuuuute.

What's not to love, in a bashing or fight, he's big enough to get your back.

[Daniel Jackson]

I'm a collegiate swimmer for the University of South Carolina. I'm a freshman at USC and came out last summer right before I came to college. I came out to the team about 3 weeks into the semester. They've been really supportive and like Sims the guys have asked all sorts of questions, not out of hate but just out of curiousity. It caught the team off guard as expected but I was surprised and grateful that they have accepted that I'm who I am. I am the only out and proud gay student-athlete at USC.

[Bu_Crush_710]

i go to bloomsburg university! never heard about this! very interesting!!

[LTKManager32]

What an awesome story and what an awesome guy! I went to BU when this guy was there. We had a few classes together and we were friendly when we saw each other out.

He knew I was gay and always made a point of bringing me into group conversations or inviting me into groups! A few years back I checked up on him and saw all the activism that he was doing. He's been doing a lot of great things but he still seems like a really normal guy, in the All-American, college jock kind of way!

Brian's a great representative of the gay community and I'm really proud to have known him in college!

It sounds like we'll all get to hear a lot more about this amazing guy!

[Dan]

Let me get this straight - so to speak. A 6' 260 lb stud tells his team he is gay and what, like they are going to take that massive amount of beef and do what to him? The guy was a tank. An unstoppable tank. This would have so much more pathos if the guy was like - I dunno - like Matthew Sheppard or something.

[Steven Pool]

Football, hockey, paintball, it seems that the most violent and rugged of sports are the ones that are hard for anyone to come out in.
Glad to see that he was accepted for who he is and not what he is, we need more of that in this world in general.

[Steve M]

The guy's ex outed him? What a loser! How immature.